Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Again with this hiatus thing

It's not as though I plan them, for Pete's sake; they just seem to happen here and there. While I do love having my blog, it's nice to know that I can just come here and write when I need and want to, and when I need to take a break, I can. :) Just sayin'.

Things here are steady. I've been about as busy as I usually am, but in different ways. This is the third week in a row during which one of my children is off at camp for the week. The first week, it was Reepicheep's turn. Last week, the Pickle went. This time, it's the Frog's week away.

Now, I miss all of my children dearly when they're apart from me. It's as though an entire segment of my heart is just on hold somewhere, waiting for me to pick it up at the end of a line I can't seem to find. Then when I see them again, my heart is made whole, and I can breathe. You Mamas out there know that of which I speak. Probably Dads as well, but likely in a bit of a different sort of way.

When the Frog is gone, though, I'm missing not just part of my heart, but pretty much my left arm and my right foot, too. While the Reepicheep and the Pickle are immensely helpful and do their chores for the most part without too much aggravation, the Frog is a terribly responsible helper. The little ones cling to her in much the same manner they cling to me. And though we have reached the golden age of Thirteen, and though there is no end of eye-rolling and interminable sighing, she really is a lovely girl, outside and in, and would rather give my teeth than be without her for more than a week!

For a moment, I feel as though I'm hearkening back to the days when I was the Mama of three very young children, the Frog three, the Pickle one, and the Reepicheep brand new. I felt as though the house was closing in on me. I dreaded each new day, longing through the morning for nap time to come, longing through the afternoon for My Darling to come home from work, longing through the evening for bed time, and then longing through the night for sleep to last longer than two or three hours at a time.

It's a bit of an exaggeration, I know, since the Pickle and the Reepicheep are here, and do lend a hand (!!), and the Monkey is 3, and my little Pudgy Bug is a delight......but it seems as though without the dynamic of the Frog, the kilter of the whole house is off balance.

Anyway. I shall pick her up on Friday, and things will come back to the balance I crave.

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My prayer life is gearing up again. I really don't know how else to phrase what's been happening. God has again been showing His Hand in ways I cannot possibly question as being anything other than His Will at work in my life, and in the lives of those around me. I don't know if they perceive things the way I do--if they, too, are looking always for signs of God working in their day to day living. I think a great deal of it is that I feel my heart being called to spend every moment, offer every task for my Lord. For whatever purpose He would have, I fold the laundry. For however He chooses to use the sacrifice of my time, I stand at the sink and wash dishes by hand, rather than pop them into the dishwasher. I have found it more pleasant, and easier to offer the small, menial things of my day lately, thanks be to God! This is something I've been praying for and longing for in my heart for a long, long time. What a blessing!!

Another blessing is that last week I was able to have a root canal. Blessing??? you say? Yes, indeed! Oh, the pain! The agony! The only way possible to endure it was to hope that through my suffering I could be closer to My Lord....but I must say, I was thrilled to sit in that chair and have it end! Next week I get the first of two crowns; the second will come the following week. Modern dental care is amazing!

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